back to YOU

You were here, before I realize
Your love is real, before I know what love is
Every second your love is only made for me
Sealed in every sunshine
As mild as morning coffee, refresh each part of me
 
Your love like a sun
So genuine that never expect any return
Your love is spacious
So broad that never get less or shrink
Your love as solid as coral
Never turn to somebody else, standing still just for me
 
You teach me how to take and gve
You show me the beauty of life trough your love stance
Your immense love
Your greatest love, how come I cheat on you?
 
But another love coming and greeeting
Offering a new color in a different impression
And I got easily trapped within
Humanly love that alluring, yet could be so sore
Teach me another meaning of love words
Mortal, temporary dan deadly
 
Only your love is timeless
Only yours is truthful
Accept me in my nudity, bluntness, and weakness
Only you who embrace me in weariness and slenderness
And I was the most stupid living who ignored and forgot you
When you never even once leave me
And you smile wider welcoming me back
Last night...
When I cried...
Knocking your door...
My gorgeous prince,
Allah
 
 
 
 
 
Allahu akbar, 28 June 2010

HJJ

Apa tuh? HJJ = Hubungan Jarak Jauh. Maksa banget ya? bahasa jawanya sih LDR alias Long Distance Relatioship.

Siapa sih yang mau memilih LDR? Nobody. Tapi siapa yang tahu rencana Tuhan? Tau-tau pas seminar di Ausie, lirik-lirikan ama bule, terus... trus? trus apa jeng? yee... jangan ngeres dulu, maksudnya trus jatuh cinta. Setiap orang belum tentu mengalami LDR, tapi kalau ditanya untung ruginya, bisa dipastikan hampir 50% bilang hubungan LDR banyak ruginya, dan banyakan tidak berhasil. Tidak salah memang, LDR banyak tantangannya, salah beberapanya :

- extra budget : buat beli pulsa, buat beli tiket travel jakarta -bandung

(ssttt!... Jangan bilang-bilang napa?).

- Kesepian. Malem minggu ga ada yang bisa diajak nonton, makan

bareng,... mupeng ngliatin pasangan lain, hiks hiks

- Tersiksa, terutama bagi mereka yang tidak bisa kalau tidak ketemuan,

pegang-pegang tangan. Pinginnya bermesraan terus, manja - manjaan.

Meskipun sudah video call, ceting 24 hours, yang namanya KEHADIRAN

tetap dibutuhkan.

Tapi jangan parno duluan... in case tiba2 si aa' mesti kuliah keluar negeri. Bukan jauh dekatnya yang menjadi parameter kegagalan LDR, tapi lo mampu ga ngejalaninnya? Eeits... LDR jangan diliat sebagai momok. Anggap aja ini adalah ujian seberapa besar komitmen si doi. Jarak bukan untuk selamanya tho, suatu saat pasti ingin bersatu. Apa? Belum dibicarain? Cepetan diomongin jeung... Palagi buat yang masih pacaran (jangan nunjuk orang lain ning.... .). Capek hati & kantong kering, tapi belum jelas hubungan ini mo dibawa kemana? ck ck ck ck.... Tanya diri sendiri lagi, apa yang paling diinginkan dalam suatu hubungan, apa iya kedekatan fisik lebih berarti dibandingkan kedekatan hati? Dua-duanya berarti jee...

Positif thingking aja, sapa bilang LDR ga ada untungnya? Kita bisa lebih saling mengapresiasi , dan bila saatnya tiba, waktu akan sangat berharga. Biarpun semalem abis bertengkar di telpon, pas ketemu tiba-tiba aja sudah lupa kalau lagi berantem. Biasanya kita jaim di depan doi. Nah.. dengan LDR kita bisa melakukan hal-hal gila yang tidak akan bisa dilakukan berdua. Dari pada nungguin dia nelpon atau ngebales sms, mendingan fave fun ama temen.

LDR sebenernya sama dengan hubungan lainnya, mau HTS, mau back street, peluang keberhasilannya juga sama. Fifty fifty, ya iyalah... yang paling penting adalah komitmen. Jadi jangan bosen kalau aku berulang-ulang nyebutin itu (only to remind myself, hehehe). Komunikasi perlu, meskipun cuma nelpon bentar atau sms nanyain "dah maem,yang? Jangan lupa sholat.... Lagi ngapain? "Sekali-lagi nggombal juga ga apa-apa kok. Tapi jangan juga keseringan sms, mesti pengertian kalau yayank punya kesibukan lain dan tidak selamanya be there for us. Yang penting mah, kita tau apa yang sedang dia lakukan. Jadi kalo sms ga dibales, jangan langsung prejudice yang macem-macem. Saling percaya dan jangan gampang cemburu. Cemburu adalah bentuk cinta seseorang, tapi bukan berarti semua temen kantor cowoknya patut dicurigai. Klo mikir aneh2, ntar malah kejadian beneran loh jeung... Meskipun kangen dah di ubun-ubun, sampai ga nafsu makan n susah tidur, tapi kita ga bisa maksain bertemu. Pengertian dikit donk. Ya kalo jaraknya cuma satu jam, tapi klo nyebrang lautan, bagimane? Buat mereka yang ga bisa jauh dari soulmate, mendingan cari kesibukan lain. Hidup ga akan berhenti karena dia jauh. Masih ada temen kuliah, temen kantor. Atau lakukan kegiatan bersama-sama, tapi dianya di sana kita di sini. Maksudnye? Ajak aja dia nonton film, abis itu dibahas bareng-bareng di tilpun.

So, berani mengambil tantangan LDR? ......lo kate acara tipi?

spinning

The line is exist

Sometimes it seems vague,

but suddenly it can be so real

Make a giant wall that parted our world

This line shattered me into thousand pieces with question mark on each face

I scream looking for the answer

but there is only faint wheeze over the hollow space

I just realized that i no longer owe hearth

Does he?

Is it?

Am i?

Can i?

What if?

What should i...

I feel so tiny coz you are standing far on the other side

Sometime i dont know who you are

I don't understand a single word you said

You look like an alien coming from other galaxy

Are you?

I hate when i got paralyzed by those questions

stupid things that spinning over and over again in my head

All i need most is your hand

to take me across the line

get together into your world

where we bound each other

thanks... but, sorry

thank you for criticizing on how i look, only your word i wanna listen to

thank you for your weird look when i say something stupid, it shows me that i know nothing about the world you live in

thank you for arguing my sentences, sometimes i can be such stubborn

thank you for doing nothing when i am in a bad mood, maybe it will turn to be hard if you act the same way to

thank you for ignoring me, coz sometime i can be such boring and tacky

thank you for telling the truth that i am not that kind pretty, so when you peek on a girl i wont feel guilty doing the same thing to other guy

thank you for being honest about the way i act, childish and reckless, so that i can learn how to be better man

thank you for teasing me how chubby i am, how big my nose is, reminds me how lucky i am you wanna accept me

thank you for let me be myself

but,...... sorry that i can not be the perfect woman in your life

because of u

because of u i want to wake up early just to hear your hoarse voice

because of u i have reason to go to salon ( i can be such feminine, u know)

because of u i have refused many guys who want to take me out (don't ask how many)

because of u i experienced what jealousy is (have u ever thought whenever u hang around with your friends instead of me?)

because of u i have longer pray (just to ask that u're my mr. right guy)

because of u i have learned how to cook (at least i can make a fried rice)

because of u i have been forced to be a grown up woman

because of u i have learned not to be selfish (no longer me but us)

because of u i realized that i am not that strong (i still need a man)

because of u i have learned how to take n give

because of u i found out how lucky i am (to have u in my life)

because of u i know what love is

thanks for u my man

just let me be your...

let me be a shoulder for you to lean on

let me be a pillow for u to cry on (i doubt you do)

let me be a garbage bin if you wanna grumble on something

let me be a wall if you wanna yell on someone

let me be your partner for looking solution of your problem

let me be a clown when you are down (though i am not that funny)

let me be a radio to cheer up your bad day (a broken radio, i think)

let me be a candlelight when you are lost in the dark

let me be a mirror for you to look into

let me be your shelter when you wanna runaway from life

let me be your savior when you feel weak

let me be a cup of torajan coffee to accompany you late at night

i charge nothing for those services, but your truly love

is missing... ... ...

"Kiss me" by SNTR is swinging over my ears

teasing my lonely hearts

dying of you

playing portraits of you

your silly face

your naughty smile

your offended grimace

your insulted look

something annoyed but i like

something that i miss so

my head full of you

almost explode by huge longing

nearly desperate calling your name

i merely see you on the bus

on the street billboard

in the class presentation

counting minutes you've left since

this feeling is so torturing

do you feel the same way too?

my life in incomplete when you are away

please come back & bring my half heart you've stolen

i damn miss you now

i love u for no reason

i am falling in love

long time i was waiting for, but i don't realize when it came

i just knew it

i didn't even think

cause i get insane when meet u

my world torn down when i see u

my heart jump up and down whenever u are near

that's love

l for loosing my mind

o for over addicted

v for vicinity of u

e for everything on u i like it so much

the way u smile

the way u walk

the scent of your body

your hoarse voice in the morning

i like u every inch

but i don't know why

u like watching motogp

i like reading novel

u are dying of travelling

i am a sun-hater

u are so messy

i am a fashion freak

but that's love

no one can describe what love is

the feeling when your hand touch mine

it takes my breath away

when our eyes meet, you take my soul with

i love u for who u are, not for a reason